I just came back from a short evening walk on our property. Every time I go for a walk and look around here everything, seems to be different – more beautiful, more peaceful, more inviting. I love the place more every day. Today and even better tonight as the moon is shining very brightly, though the full moon is a few days away. The road was as clearly visible as if it was daylight. Slowly the evenings and mornings are getting cooler. There was hardly any breeze, but the air was quite fresh. I was wearing a jumper, but one was not enough. I wrapped my arms around myself and it felt... warmer, but at the same time it felt as if somebody was holding me tightly. I could see the headlights of cars passing on the highway, but I could not hear any traffic noise. The only sounds I could hear were thumps of jumping kangaroos, whose shadows I could see from time to time moving across the paddock. I stopped near our gate and looked at the gumtrees – their leaves were sparkling in the silver light of the moon. Everything seemed so peaceful, calm and quiet. I walked by myself, this time even Darcy was too lazy to come with me, but again I was not alone...
I thought about the time when we bought the farm. We looked at many properties and actually we had bought another lot of land. That particular day we were on our way to town to pay the deposit and complete the formalities. On the way we stopped to have a look at a property which we found on realestate.com. As soon as I saw it I knew that this is the place I want to live. It was like love at first sight. Though at the beginning, it was a bit funny. When we arrived at the “approximate” address we were not sure which property was for sale, as it was not clear from the signs along the road. However, I had the overwhelming feeling that I am in the right place and I simply had to see the property. Going away without seeing it was not an option. I noticed somebody on the top of a hill next to a shed. I wanted to go and talk to the person. George was a bit shy, but I did not allow him to stop me. I went up the hill and George, after a while of hesitation, joined me. It happened that the person I saw was the wife of the owner of the property for sale. She was there with her children waiting for her husband. We asked if we could have a look at the property and she agreed. When we came back the owner was there also. After a short chat we... made a deal. It had to go through a real estate agent, there were some dramas, but at the end, the property was ours. I loved the farm from the first glimpse. And from my experience, I know that when I follow my intuition everything will be fine, I will make the right decision. Only when I go against my intuition, I get burned... It happened a few times... Using my “common sense” and logic never works for me. So, I have loved the farm until today, actually now I love it even more than at the beginning.
The walk tonight reminds me of another experience – a camping trip with my friend Amir. I am not sure if I mentioned him to you before. We were friends
for a few years and we went for a couple of camping trips together. I met him a few months after Adam broke up with me. Amir was also heart-broken, but
“further advanced on the recovery path” than I was at that time. We were friends, nothing to do with romance, neither of us were interested in a romantic
relationship. It was friendship for a few years and somehow, with time, our contact broke up.
On our first camping trip together, to Sundown National Park, we were very late. Actually it was already 1am when we arrived at the destination. The night was marvellous - a full-moon and not a cloud in the sky. It was a bit cool, but pleasant. We went for a walk along a river. Actually the river had dried out and we walked on the big smooth stones which usually lie on the bottom of a wide river. I still remember how clearly I could see all the stones in the silver light of the moon. I remember the great feeling of freedom I had during the walk. At that time I looked at all the little things which would prove to me that I am better off and much happier without Adam than I was with him. It was helping me to get through the difficult time. This kind of walk was one of the little things I could not do with Adam. I mean we would not go for this kind of a walk. We used to do these types of crazy things in the first few years of our relationship, but later he started to believe that he has to behave like an adult, which means being serious, solemn and profound (or maybe arrogant and boring). Going for a walk at night-time and enjoying the moon is not mature and serious behaviour (at least not for Adam). Anyway, I did what I love and I had a great time. And after the walk it was quite funny. Before we left for the trip Amir told me that he has a big tent and we could just use his. I insisted that I will take mine and stay in a separate tent. After the walk Amir asked me again “Are you sure you want to set up your tent?” I said “No, I am too tired. I will help you to set up your tent and then you sleep on one side and I will sleep on the other”. He just laughed. It was a great trip, I have very good memories from that time.
I had quite a good day today on the farm. I also went to town and spend a lot of time with Penny. I know that you were working today, so it was not much fun for you but hopefully, the day was not too bad and you had some time to get some of your work done.
Lots of Wings,